All in all, I lead a pretty calm life. I suppose trading gives me a few thrills, but I try to mitigate those as best as possible. Certainly one wouldn’t say golf rivals mountain climbing, and raising Poodles isn’t nearly as taxing as caring for Border Collies.
On the flip side, being robbed at knife point (or more accurately, crow bar point) in the middle of the night….in your own home, certainly has to be at the pointy end of the bell curve.
Now as background, I sleep upstairs, Nancy downstairs. She has trouble sleeping to begin with, and gets up at 4AM anyway to coach. Long ago we decided “separate but equal” bedrooms was the way to go.
In any event, my bedroom door sticks and as the dogs sleep with me, I always shut it at night. That was helpful, because about 11:30PM in late July, the noise of it being opened woke me up. That and two fairly large men wearing ski masks, waving flashlights, and coming towards my bed at a high rate of speed had me screaming.
Now, I’m not Rambo. I’m not a trained martial artist. I have minimal defense skills. But, I do have a nasty — although hidden — temper. That, combined with a healthy dose of adrenaline, and my first reaction was to tackle assailant #1.
It was pure instinct, but somewhere along the line I realized it was going to be him or me, so I fought like crazy. That is, until Nancy heard the shouting, came upstairs and turned on the lights. She asked everyone to calm down, which was fortunate because the Head Thug was instructing my wrestling buddy to slug me with the crowbar.
So, in orderly fashion we were herded down to Nancy’s bedroom where they helped themselves to all her jewelry, my watch, and a few handbags. Ironically, they left my wallet, the Ipads and the laptops.
They ordered us into a closet with the obligatory, “don’t come out or we’ll kill you” command straight from The Robber’s Handbook, and left after about 20 minutes.
Wearing gloves, ski masks, and black SWAT team outfits, the Police had no chance of finding them, and so far there’s not been a clue.
A few thoughts, then:
1. It was scary, but for me, only about the first 30 seconds when I was startled awake. The rest of the time, I wasn’t scared at all. I was pissed.
2. We do have an alarm. Shame on us for not setting it at night. If we had, and it had gone off when they entered the house, I would have had at least a minute or so to grab a baseball bat or golf club.
3. So much for dog protection. I’m pretty certain ours slept through the commotion.
4. Homeowners insurance doesn’t cover the bulk of jewelry losses. You need a separate rider for that. Playing the odds, we didn’t have that rider. Ugh.
5. We don’t own a gun, although I did contemplate and even tried a few out after that night. Believe me, I’d have zero problem using it if forced. My concern is that I’d end up shooting Nancy or one of the kids.
6. Somewhere along the line, I was hit pretty hard with that crowbar, as I woke up the next morning with a 6 inch welt on my side in the shape of a capital J. Never felt it at the time, and I now understand how a Mother can lift a car off a trapped child.